Parental Alienation Syndrome | Who does it Effect?
Most of the parents we’ve encountered have never heard of the term “parental alienation syndrome.”
It wasn’t before I went through my own child custody battle and learned of the term.
It originates from Dr. Richard A. Gardner, a child psychiatrist, who specialized in child psychotherapy and custody evaluations, introduced the distinct pattern of behavior.
It’s the intentional psychological manipulation of a child against the other parent.
This can include shaming and even threatening the child for showing any affection towards the other parent.
It is a distinctive form of psychological abuse and family violence towards both the child and the rejected family members that occurs almost exclusively in association with family separation or divorce, particularly where legal action is involved.- Wikipedia
Who does it effect?
Parental Alienation Syndrome directly effects the child. It affects the parent-child relationship of the targeted parent. It can also effect friends and extended family members of the targeted parent. Parental Alienation Syndrome impacts our court system, social services, and other resources made available to the public including doctors and therapists as well.
How does Parental Alienation Syndrome effect a child?
Parental alienation syndrome can affect a child in a multitude of ways.
For one, a child is not naturally taught to fear or hate. It is a form of psychological abuse and manipulation of a child. It doesn’t take much for someone to realize it’s not healthy or in a child’s best interest.
“Every child has a fundamental right and need for an unthreatened and loving relationship with both parents. To be denied that right by one parent, without sufficient justification such as abuse or neglect, is itself a form of child abuse.” -Edward Kruk, Ph.D, Psychology Today
For this example, I’ll use an analogy of Pit Bulldogs.
Pit Bulls are some of the most loving, full of life, and innocent dogs on the planet.
As puppies, they are not naturally mean or aggressive. Being a former dog breeder, I know this first hand. They will literally jump up in your lap and kiss your face off with sweet puppy dog kisses.
However, if you train, instill fear, and hate into the dog, they can be a very aggressive dog and cause a lot of harm to others.
So, in the same way, our children are born. Loving, full of life and innocent. It isn’t until someone teaches or instills into them this behavior.
Children are being taught and influenced to lie without any consequences.
A lot of parents already struggle with teaching their children the difference between right and wrong. Good and evil, respect, manners etc.
Then, when you have a parent who intentionally teaches their child(ren) to act and behave in a manner which is contrary to good morals.
Behavior and unhealthy relationships are only the beginning of issues a child effected by parental alienation will encounter throughout their lives.
As you can quickly see. This is an issue which needs more attention to. Especially in the society in which we live in today.
Can you imagine what it must be like for a child caught in the middle of a situation Ike this? My heart truly goes out to them.
How does parental alienation syndrome affect the Parent?
Parental alienation syndrome also affects the targeted parent.
For example, it can cause a parent to feel unworthy, of lesser value than another human, and parent. It is unnatural for a child to not show affection towards another loving parent.
Rejection is another characteristic of alienated parents.
It can make the targeted parent feel like it’s their fault. This is especially true when it comes to fathers.
Most men in this country already face an uphill battle when it comes to custody and visitation issues. It’s a pretty fair statement to say this contributes greatly to father’s not being in their children’s lives.
It can cause a parent to feel depressed, socially awkward , and not accepted. They feel like they are the only ones who are going through the same thing or are the only ones dealing with the same problem, and with no solution to the problem.
It can also be hard to relate to someone if you have never gone through something similar in life, and feel there is a disconnect with that person.
Long-Term Effects of PA and PAS
More specific and severe effects of parental alienation has on children are well-documented—low self-esteem and self-hatred, lack of trust, depression, and substance abuse and other forms of addiction are widespread, as children lose the capacity to give and accept love from a parent. – The Impact Parental Alienation has on Children, Psychology Today
Parental alienation syndrome and Pas making progress
Parental alienation syndrome also is known as “parental alienation” or “PAS”, is a criminal form of child abuse in Mexico and Brazil. The World Health Organization now adding it to their ICD-11.
One can only hope the U.S, legal system quickly follows suit. With experts and scientific facts, it can have lifelong psychological and emotional effects on our children. The time to act is now.
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. – Frederick Douglas
First of all. We hope you or someone you know never has to experience this.
If if you do we can certainly empathize with you.
Don’t give up hope on your child or children. Parental Alienation is gaining more and more attention.
If your child has been exposed to this. Consider putting them in counseling and seeking the help they need.
Do do some research yourself on the subject and advocate for change when you can.
Parental alienation isn’t a good situation to be in for your children or yourself. Keep the faith and keep fighting the good fight of faith!
Find a support group if you can. You are not alone or the only parent who has experienced this.
Thanks for reading. We hope we have helped some light or helped in someway.
If so, please leave a comment for share this post with a friend.
Take care of yourself and God Bless.